TOTALLY GNARLY

Since I turned 40 my body thinks it's 14 again, a second puberty, if you will. I bought new bras and had to go up a size to DDD..or as most manufacturers list them, F. They completely skip the E and dive straight into the next letter. I'm a 38 F. Holy Jesus on a cracker.
Also Retin-A is back in my life as an acne renaissance took place on my 40 year old face a few months ago. No wrinkles, no mustache, just zits.
If my dentist tells me I need to wear braces again, somebody send in the Quantum Leap guy to rescue me.